In a column that was almost all positive, King really only had four negative things to say--he made fun of some elementary school girls, a reporter, Midwestern coffee and Jarrett. And only Jarrett got ripped on more than once. The sad part is he did a poor job of mocking all of them.
To begin with, he mocks a reporter questioning Calvin Johnson (who, by the way, will not be available to the Vikings with the #7 pick. No way, no how.).
'Would you have any problem playing in a colder climate, like a Minnesota?'
--Reporter's question to Georgia Tech's Calvin Johnson during Johnson's press conference at the Combine Saturday afternoon. The Vikings have played in a dome since 1981."
King apparently has not been to Minnesota in December. It's just a little bit colder outside than it is in Georgia, where Calvin Johnson has lived his entire life. But I guess it's unreasonable to ask if Johnson cares about having to experience winter for the first time.
King's just warming up, however. He then preceeds to go after Dwayne Jarrett as if Jarrett had stolen his "coffee flavored water" or made a colonoscopy joke in his presence.
He starts off with a shot at Jarrett for being "bitter" because his stock is dropping. The quote doesn't sound bitter to me, but then again I wasn't there, so I can't comment on Jarrett's tone:
" Just look at my body of work at USC. I won a national championship as a freshman. I've been all-American two times, broke every record at USC,You better not sound bitter around King though, because, God help him, he will savage you if you do.
fourth in NCAA history in scoring touchdowns. I had 41. So look at the
"'I respect him, he respects me, and that's how we pretty much differ.'
--Dwayne Jarrett, on his relationship with former USC wideout Mike Williams.
Was that English he was speaking?"
"Dwayne Jarrett said Saturday that Pete Carroll's coaching staff at USC 'is the best coaching staff I've ever been around.' What a tribute! Did you know the USC coaching staff is better than New Brunswick (N.J.) High's? Amazing"
That Jarrett--such a jackass. How dare he compliment his coaching staff! He's too bitter! Jarrett is awful! Don't draft him! He's a cancer! He's no Tom Brady! Or Troy Smith!
Then again, I guess that's what I get for reading Peter King--lattes, slurping and irrational hatred.